A few weeks ago, I went to a touch positive event and had such a great time. It was pleasure to alternate between conversation and introverted people watching. Mixed in with the social enjoyment, I also had an experience with a participant that pushed my boundaries. Not a ton, but enough for it to be on my mind the next day. I decided to request a conversation with him about it. When he responded to my message that he was open to talk, I thought to myself, “Oh dear, it’s go time.”
Time for courage.
In our phone talk, my goal was to remain non-judgmental and honest. It was a good conversation! He was receptive to what I had to share, and by the end of our chat, he told me he was grateful for my approach. He said it gave him something to think about. Good!
I left the experience feeling proud of how far I’ve come in helping others understand where I’m coming from as it relates to respecting my physical space. What he wasn’t at first understanding but finally got is that what may seem like a small error on his part touched an edgy place within me. A place that I call trauma.
In the past few years, I’ve put special attention on the subject of trauma – for myself personally and also so that I can be a better teacher. My studies have served me well. I especially recommend Waking the Tiger and The Body Keeps the Score – both are books. And there’s a documentary that adds great compassion and value to this important topic:
The Wisdom of Trauma with Gabor Maté.
The filmmaking team is trying to change the way our whole culture thinks about trauma, and I’m so grateful to them. In their latest email, it read:
“It starts when we allow our pain to teach us about listening, self-love and compassion and to remind us of the preciousness of life. Then truth opens our hearts and our innate wisdom begins to shine through our wounds.”
That’s how I handled myself with that guy from the party. With innate wisdom.
The film is now available in twenty languages on their website and on a donation basis. I recommend The Wisdom of Trauma highly.