The Art of Living in Your Body
Up until a few years ago, I wasn't completely aware that I had a body. Of course, I knew what a body was and that I had one, but my experience of it was more of being a brain with limbs. Almost all of my day-to-day attention was spent "neck up" in my thoughts. I...
The Delightful Mystery of National Cuddle Up Day
A few months ago, someone posted on my Facebook page an announcement of a holiday I’d never heard of - National Cuddle Up Day. Cute! I decided to learn more about it because it seems like something Cuddle Sanctuary could embrace (hyuk hyuk). I found an upbeat website...
A New Year’s Ritual
Years ago, I worked with an executive coach who shared with me a terrific New Year's ritual called "Complete and Create." It's an easy and satisfying way to say good-bye to the old year and how-do-you-do to the new one. On a piece of paper, make four lists. List any...
Navigating Challenging Conversations with Relatives
‘Tis the season for many of us to spend time with relatives. That could mean laughter, fun, caroling, tinsel, gifts and copious amounts of eggnog. I hope so! It could also mean falling back into old patterns, regressing to your younger, less evolved self and feeling...
My Partner Doesn’t Want Me to Attend Cuddle Events
I received an email this week from a former Cuddle Sanctuary attendee who kindly gave me permission to share it. I’ve changed his name and the names of every other person I mention below... Jean, hi. Hope you are well. Do you find when people start dating,...
The Healing Power of Pleasure
When I was just beginning my career as a professional cuddler, I spent a lot of time imagining what the job would look like. Here’s what I saw in my mind’s eye: I would hold people close. We would have deep, meaningful conversations. They would open up to me, and I...
Let’s Get Our Gratitude On!
Welcome to the Thanksgiving Edition of Cuddle Sanctuary’s (mostly) weekly blog! For some, the holidays offer a welcome break from routine and a chance to hang out with people that they love. For others, it’s a time to remember and mourn people who are no longer here....
3 Key Ingredients to Curb Loneliness
Do you get lonely? I do. It’s my least favorite emotion to experience. Wait a minute, you say. How do you get lonely, Fei? You’re married, and you cuddle people all day long! You’re right. In general, I do have a lot of connection in my life. More than most, perhaps....
Four years ago I was assaulted
(Trigger Warning) A few months ago I was at an event with old and new friends when something strange happened. I was in the midst of a conversation. There were three of us. I got very quiet and very anxious. When one of them asked me what was wrong, I said, “I don’t...
6 Ways to Get Better at Hearing “No”
I really like getting what I want. I especially like getting what I want when I want it. Well, this makes hearing “No” really challenging at times. In fact, I’ve often gone out of my way to avoid those difficult feelings of rejection by not asking for what I want in...