I received an email from the producer of a YouTube series called UnderVlogs. They wanted me to teach their group of Instagram influencers how to be professional cuddlers. And of course they needed to capture the experience on video.

I was skeptical

I checked out their YouTube channel and it was – well – I would call is slapsticky. I worried that they’d go for cheap jokes and at best make me look dumb and at worst turn people off of cuddling as a wellness activity.

Comedy is Dangerous

I’ve been down this road before a few years ago when Cuddle Sanctuary got a call from Comedy Central. A show starring comedian Nikki Glaser wanted to create a segment where she would try a cuddle event for the first time. I found sample videos and came to the conclusion that the chances of us being presented in a favorable light were slim. The show itself is called Not Safe and I’d say that refers to any group that agrees to participate. (Nikki is skilled at ridiculing people humorously.)

But It’s Comedy Central!

Did y’all know that my main intent for coming to Los Angeles was to be an actor? Yes, I went to school out here but my real passion was to “make it.” I went after it for seventeen years and struggled a lot with self-worth, sadness and my stubborn habit of trying to force my way towards success. I became a much happier, more productive person when I pivoted my efforts and started working as a corporate trainer. I felt for the first time what it was like to use my performing arts skills, have a positive impact and get paid.

After so many years of trying to claw my way into auditions for entertainment production companies, I experienced a jolt of excitement that my work at Cuddle Sanctuary had production companies calling me. I really wanted to be part of a Comedy Central production, and millions of people might learn about the benefits of cuddle events. I took the risk.

How did it go?

One way I measure the results of a media appearance is if I see an uptick of sign-ups for my free email lessons. Another measure is that people begin attending our events or requesting services and say, “I heard about you on _____.” 

The segment that was broadcast was both funny and unflattering. Sadly, there was no increase in sign ups. It’s been three years and no one has ever found us and said, “I saw you on Comedy Central.” I created a video about the behind-the-scenes experience here. (Pardon the cheesy music – what was I thinking!)

I said No with a dollar sign.

With the Comedy Central experience under my belt, I didn’t have high hopes about how this production would go. So I set the price for the training that they requested at a premium. I knew the rate was way more than any production would pay. It was my way of saying Probably Not.

The next morning, I had a change of heart. I knew what they really needed, and I could deliver it in one day for less money. It also occurred to me that with a smaller production, I could set boundaries about the content. I contacted the producer again and streamlined my offer to something in the realm of approachable. 

My boundary.

One of the performers who was also a producer was Tyler Regan. Young, athletic, good-looking: Tyler scared me a little bit.

My fear was that Tyler might make light of an issue that I hold sacred: consent. The idea that he might roll his eyes about how we practice consent at Cuddle Sanctuary stressed me out. Maybe I shouldn’t have worried. What I didn’t know at the time was that Tyler is partnered with a very empowered, successful woman – Rachel Levin! To me, that says a lot right there about his character. The production promised not to poke fun about consent.

The production had needs, too.

One of the producers – Zach – explained to me in a phone call that the segment still  had to be fun. We agreed on the production’s approach which would be to find what’s funny without tearing at the fabric of what Cuddle Sanctuary offers. With these discussions behind us, the next steps became easy and enjoyable. I thought of ideas for the second part of their “cuddle boot camp” that were wonderfully ridiculous and just right for the tone for their channel. And on the day of shooting, I felt comfortable and playful and at my best. I liked meeting and working with this team of influencers!

The result? A gift to me.

A few days ago, their fast-moving production released “We Became Professional Cuddlers for A Day.” I watched it and laughed out loud. I watched it again and was amazed: This video captured the content of our events better than any other production has! One could watch this entertaining segment and actually learn about consent! Holy guacamole!

Ready to See the Video?

I’m grateful that I opened my mind and gave this production a chance. I’m beyond grateful that they gave me a platform to share my work with their audience. Thank you Rachel, Caoimhe, Tyler, Zach and the production team of Undervlogs!